Hmm...
Well...
I told my Mom about everything, I wrote it all in a note and told her not to say anything til she had finished reading it all. She read it all, and then understood alot of what has been going on in my life the past nine months or so.
She now understands my reasons for alot of things alot better, and she understands why I need to do or not do certian things, and she isn't acting funny really, so I think that she understands most of it. She is being a little more considerate thought.
I went to Six Flags today, and it was fun. I really enjoyed it. Jenni, Amanda, and I went.
Roller Coasters + Vertigo Boy = Bad Idea.
But despite the obvious above, I tried them anyway. It was pretty sweet in the end cause it really really threw me bad to go on them. I was back to holding on to stuff to walk for about twenty min after Batman, and after Freeze ... It was like hours. The Food sucked, and we had to wait in line three times for the Freeze cause it kept closing when we would get to the front of the line, but it was a lot of fun going to the park today.
Jenni knew about my arm, and Amanda didn't see it. So that was probably a good thing. Less to explain to her. And that way she doesn't get any ideas or anything. Not that I think that she is depressed, but I do think that she is down.
I am so glad that I am back talking to Jenni again. And so glad that I am seeing so much of her. It relaxes me so much to be around her cause I had been so close over the three and a half years we spent together. I actually slept ten hours last night, and I had a nap in the afternoon too. I have been sleeping so well lately, and sorry if this offends, but I am truely at ease for the first time in a long time. I had tried everything to bring back my peace of mind, when all it took was finding an old and dear friend again.
Bobby is moving, So that is kinda weird. No more stumbling home drunk at 5 in the morning, or walking to his place to hang out. So sad. He has lived there since I have been here in Missouri, and it is just weird. Any who, I helped him move some stuff a few days ago, and unfortunately this is the week that he is moving to the apartment else i would be hanging out with him more. But he is busy with all that, and I would just be in the way for the most part. But I will be back here in STL in four weeks. Then it is back to the suckiness that is Rolla.
I am thinking about camping some next semester. That sounds like fun. And I thought about going to Johnsons shut-ins with the guys, and cooking out once a month, and a few other "male bonding" things. But... The camping probably won't be with them ... Dunno.
I havn't felt the need to have any alcohol at all this week. At All. That is really strange. I dont' think that it was ever me being an alcoholic, it was just me trying to get away from the pain I was feeling inside. And to tell the absolute honest truth, I have barely had a day when I didn't want to drink since last October. I didn't drink everyday, but most days I did want to. I did want to get drunk and forget everything. I will post an awesome song next. But about two to three weeks ago, my wanting to dwindled alot. Then this week, I havn't wanted to drink at all. I went out with Bobby Mike and Rene, I had two beers with dinner. But that was a social type of thing, and I didn't want more even though I wasn't paying.
I had no need for the alcohol. It did taste really good, and it is weird, but I do like the taste of beer. But I don't really want to drink anymore. Not unless it is just one or two for a social, good flavor type of thing. No more midnight, hundred dollar, Alcohol runs to Walmart cause I really want to drink. Possibly the end of TNDC, and MNDC, WNDC, RNDC, FNDC, SNDC, and SSUD. If you don't know and do ask. It is something I don't really want to go over right now.
Life is good. Life is life again.
Life is near. Life is me again.
Dunno. That is all I really have.
I really am not trying to hurt anyone, or make any sort of statement in this blog, it is just real life, real situations, real solutions.
If anything in this post is offensive to you, or someone you know Please contact me at 1-800-DNT-CARE.
No animals were harmed in the writing of this blog. Except the ten dogs, two cats, and the horse. Oh, The chinchilla ... wasn't me.
I.L.U.
EOM
I told my Mom about everything, I wrote it all in a note and told her not to say anything til she had finished reading it all. She read it all, and then understood alot of what has been going on in my life the past nine months or so.
She now understands my reasons for alot of things alot better, and she understands why I need to do or not do certian things, and she isn't acting funny really, so I think that she understands most of it. She is being a little more considerate thought.
I went to Six Flags today, and it was fun. I really enjoyed it. Jenni, Amanda, and I went.
Roller Coasters + Vertigo Boy = Bad Idea.
But despite the obvious above, I tried them anyway. It was pretty sweet in the end cause it really really threw me bad to go on them. I was back to holding on to stuff to walk for about twenty min after Batman, and after Freeze ... It was like hours. The Food sucked, and we had to wait in line three times for the Freeze cause it kept closing when we would get to the front of the line, but it was a lot of fun going to the park today.
Jenni knew about my arm, and Amanda didn't see it. So that was probably a good thing. Less to explain to her. And that way she doesn't get any ideas or anything. Not that I think that she is depressed, but I do think that she is down.
I am so glad that I am back talking to Jenni again. And so glad that I am seeing so much of her. It relaxes me so much to be around her cause I had been so close over the three and a half years we spent together. I actually slept ten hours last night, and I had a nap in the afternoon too. I have been sleeping so well lately, and sorry if this offends, but I am truely at ease for the first time in a long time. I had tried everything to bring back my peace of mind, when all it took was finding an old and dear friend again.
Bobby is moving, So that is kinda weird. No more stumbling home drunk at 5 in the morning, or walking to his place to hang out. So sad. He has lived there since I have been here in Missouri, and it is just weird. Any who, I helped him move some stuff a few days ago, and unfortunately this is the week that he is moving to the apartment else i would be hanging out with him more. But he is busy with all that, and I would just be in the way for the most part. But I will be back here in STL in four weeks. Then it is back to the suckiness that is Rolla.
I am thinking about camping some next semester. That sounds like fun. And I thought about going to Johnsons shut-ins with the guys, and cooking out once a month, and a few other "male bonding" things. But... The camping probably won't be with them ... Dunno.
I havn't felt the need to have any alcohol at all this week. At All. That is really strange. I dont' think that it was ever me being an alcoholic, it was just me trying to get away from the pain I was feeling inside. And to tell the absolute honest truth, I have barely had a day when I didn't want to drink since last October. I didn't drink everyday, but most days I did want to. I did want to get drunk and forget everything. I will post an awesome song next. But about two to three weeks ago, my wanting to dwindled alot. Then this week, I havn't wanted to drink at all. I went out with Bobby Mike and Rene, I had two beers with dinner. But that was a social type of thing, and I didn't want more even though I wasn't paying.
I had no need for the alcohol. It did taste really good, and it is weird, but I do like the taste of beer. But I don't really want to drink anymore. Not unless it is just one or two for a social, good flavor type of thing. No more midnight, hundred dollar, Alcohol runs to Walmart cause I really want to drink. Possibly the end of TNDC, and MNDC, WNDC, RNDC, FNDC, SNDC, and SSUD. If you don't know and do ask. It is something I don't really want to go over right now.
Life is good. Life is life again.
Life is near. Life is me again.
Dunno. That is all I really have.
I really am not trying to hurt anyone, or make any sort of statement in this blog, it is just real life, real situations, real solutions.
If anything in this post is offensive to you, or someone you know Please contact me at 1-800-DNT-CARE.
No animals were harmed in the writing of this blog. Except the ten dogs, two cats, and the horse. Oh, The chinchilla ... wasn't me.
I.L.U.
EOM
posted by ScrAgnX at 7/08/2004 09:48:00 PM
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