Yeah yeah yeah ... You can all stop bitching now

Okay. Where to Begin.

Last weekend JR came out and we went to HFStival. It was a sweet ass concert. 30 bands. Really really cool. Now I want to go to Warped Tour. 66000 people, and I couldn't get enough. Well, the heat started to suck cause it gave me a slight burn, but that happens I suppose.

Other than the concert, we just chilled all weekend. Drank some. Played video games. Just relaxed.

I am on my way to getting a 1981 Firebird. It is pretty sweet cause it's free, and the insurance won't be crazy. It will take some work, but I'm not afraid of that. And I will work overtime to pay for the parts I suppose. I am thinking about painting it Silver on top and either Blue or Green Metallic on the bottom. But that will obviously be after it is running swimmingly.

I love my car radio. Now all it needs is more power. That said, when I switch it over to the Firebird I am considering Dynomatting the car, and adding a Sub and replacing the Tweeters and Midranges when I replace the 6x9s with the ones from the Neon.

I also ordered a part this week for the Neon. It is the hose that goes from the Air Filter cover to the Air Manifold. I am gonna replace that and clean the air manifold. And that mixed with an oilchange should hopefully get the Neon back to prime condition again. Then I will start on the Firebird.

I am gonna hang out with Jessica tomorrow. It is good to have a friend in the area. It is bad that she is so far away. I don't get to hang out with her as much as I would like to. I need friends out here right now. But my boss killed the option of Bobby coming out to visit me. Damn the Terrorists. Damn them for screwing up my life. They should all die and go to hell. I wouldn't mind showing them the way...

At anyrate. (Yeah, that's a chilsonism. I know.) I can't wait to get the car parts in. That is all I am looking foward to right now. I have new computer parts, but I have lost my motivation to finish upgrading it right now. So I am gonna work on that little by litte. I need to finish doing that so I can start recording Pretender. Maybe if it rains this weekend, part of the time can be spent working on the drivers and what not.

I have been having really strange and disturbing dreams lately. I can't sleep even my token three hours a night anymore without waking four or five times. It is really sucking.

I am still losing weight. Well, I am losing fat. I am about the same weight. I havn't ran since JR came out last Friday, but I plan on remedying that tomorrow morning when I wake up. I want to lose alot more.

Everyone has been pestering the hell out of me recently. Not about any one thing in general. Just alot of different shit. It's my life damnit. I'll do what I want the way I want.

Speaking of what I want. I am looking at the laws considering Concealed Carry for Virgina. Non Residents Permit. Looks like I can get one of those, and then carry in MO. That would be cool. I would like that.

Then the other thing that I am looking at is a ROTC program. Then i could get my college paid for. I would have the honor and oppertunity to serve my country somemore. And maybe then people would be proud of me for something. I dunno. The reasons are screwy, but I think that I would make a good Marine or Army Captian. I think that I could do something good for the world.

Maybe not. Maybe I would end up turning America into a Dictatorship. No telling really. I may actually have a method for getting money while in school. Well two really, but the other one involves selling my body to science and women...We'll have to see about the first method though if it pans out it could mean serious bucks.

I have been going to the range recently. At Ten yards, 30 feet for you Business Majors (I'm looking at you Bobby. :)), I can hit a target within a 4 inch diameter circle. That is leathal. Yeah... Okay, maybe my sense of accomplishment is screwed up. But I think it is damn good. Esp for not being able to stand up straight...

Brings me to the next point. VERTIGO SUCKS. I am getting really really really ... Really pissed about this crap now. I have talked to multiple people with similar problems, and tried everything anyone I can talk to can suggest. And it is still here.

It's all okay though. I can live with it. I just wish it was gone so that I could be able to ride my bike. But that is all just technicalities.

I am working on some pretty sweet projects at work. I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you though.

I think that my parents are disappointed in me. They have been acting really strange to me lately, so I think that they think I am thier "black sheep." Maybe I am just imagining it in my brain that doesn't like losing people. Maybe I am just paranoid.

Then again, Maybe they are all out to get me. Why else would my parents want the Neon back? They are going to give it to Amanda, why the hell not let me keep it out here?

I don't know what to do about somethings. I don't want to get into all that shit though, cause non of you can help me there. I'll have to talk to one of the guys at work about all that.

Oh. And I still can't eat. Still don't get hungry or full, but feel sick about two hours after eating til about four hours after eating. It varies for the time, and how quick depending on how much I eat. I think that maybe my body isn't liking me trying to eat too many calories. I thought at first it was psychological. But now I am thinking physical (too small of a stomach), or possibly (and this is a long strech) I am unconsciously aneorexic... Though I think that is a conscious thing, and it doesn't necessarly fit. Though it isn't anything physical I can find, or that anyone can suggest.

It doesn't really matter. I am getting about 1400 cals a day still anyway. It is just annoying. One of the guys at work suggested more alcohol. Maybe I will consider that one more strongly, though it is good not having alcohol so much anymore. I don't feel that desire as much. Now I am filled with different ones, but those are less addicing ... well sorta.

Jenni Graduated. I wanted to send her a Graduation card, but I couldn't cause in my mind that would cause her more pain. Maybe not, maybe it would have reopened the friendship. But I am a wuss, and I am very afraid of hurting people. So I try not to.

That's all I got for now I suppose. So til next time...

Fuck You, You Fucking Fuckedy Fucks. I saw that quote at the concert on a shirt it was pretty sweet I thought.

SAX