Weekend Update...

So I dug a grave this weekend. It was raining, Thunder and Lighning filled the dark night sky.

Weird, but true.

The weekend was okay. Science Olympiad State was this weekend, my sister kicked ass. Checked out the Science Center for a wedding place, it looked sweet. Thinking that may be the place. Now we just have to find someone to officiate and all that Bull Shit.

I'm going to be living about 45-50 miles from work this summer, and as such am thinking that I may get a motorcycle to compensate for the gas to be used. Dunno yet obviously, but am seriously considering and looking into it.

That's about all I got.

Later

Talking

So I had a friend come to me tonight to talk as he has had a string of problems of late. I talked to him for a while, and really he doesn't have that bad of problems. It is all just sortof blown out of proportion in his own mind.

I wonder how many of my problems are that way.

I told him some of my problems to help him relate in some way and told him how I have handled them. Some of my benifit of experience in some issues helped I think. I was able to give him some of my takes on how I had handled things, and how I wish I had handled things. It helps me to think that my negitive experiences do have a positive effect. It sort of gives me justification for my actions leading to the distressing times, and allows me to see how maybe it was good for me.

Jenni's ferret is dying, which sucks. It makes me sad because I know she will be hurt when it dies. Also it is looking like she is going to be working places where she won't be able to come home much for like six months. And by much I mean like three to four days out of the six months. That will be super gay. Especally as we need to start planning the wedding and all that jazz too. Other than that thing are great with Jenni and I.

But yet I can't get rid of this aggression / depression I am in. I am switching back and forth between wanting to hurt and wanting to hurt others. I know this sounds wrong, but there have been times when everyone is pissing me off that I just want to see one of them get a failing test, or have thier car totaled. And I don't wish ill things to my friends, but sometimes I just want to see somebody else get hurt. Then there are the more worrying times when I just want something else to happen to me. There isn't a reason for this except for there to be more pain for me, because I wish these bad things on others and both aspects of that worries me. Then I talk to Jenni, and most of these feelings dissipate. And I am left feeling a whole hell of a lot better when I get of the phone with her. She seems to put everything back into perspective for me which is good.

Anyway. I have to go to bed now, maybe more of my sick and twisted ramblings soon.

Change of Mood

You know, I was in a good mood earlier.

Now I just want to break someone's face.

I could really go for a beer right now.

Rascal Flatts : See Me Through

Ah, yeah
Ah, yeah, yeah

Before we met I was free
I never had to worry about anyone but me
Now that boy is gone and in his place
Is a man who needs to hold you night and day
So if I stumble, if I fall
Forgive me, Im just learning as I go along

See me through, see me through
This aching heart has come so far
To be with you, see me through
With angel eyes, just look inside
At all thislove I never want to lose
See me through

I know sometime I let you down
But Im still getting used to having you around
And if I ever make you cry
Theres nothing I wont do to make things right
Im not perfect and thats for sure
A little time is all Im asking for

See me through, see me through
This aching heart has come so far
To be with you, see me through

With angel eyes, just look inside
At all thislove I never want to lose
See me through

See me through this mask I wear
Well, Im almost there, you know I care
I am the man you always thought you knew

See me through, see me through
This aching heart has come so far
To be with you, see me through
With angel eyes, just look inside
At all thislove I never want to lose
See me through

See me through, yeah see me through
Oh, see me through
Yeah, yeah -
Oooo, Oooo, Oooo, see me through
Oh, were almost there, cant you see that
Im almost, girl Im almost there
This mask I wear
Girl, Im almost there, Im almost there
See me, see me through this mask I wear
Im almost there
Oooo, Oooo, Oooo, girl
See me through, girl

Bobby...

Need a list of what you want. IM me.

Beach Boys - God Only Knows

I may not always love you
But long as there are stars above you
You never need to doubt it
I'll make you so sure about it

God only knows what I'd be without you

If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me

God only knows what I'd be without you

If you should ever leave me
Well life would still go on believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me

God only knows what I'd be without you

Just Miscelleneous Crap Really

Not much going on. Alot of Bull Shit is all.

Hmm...

Rebuilt my Carberator, car is running better, not quite sure what the gas mileage is I'm getting, but I'll find out soon enough. I need to fix the exhaust leak I have, I know where it is though. And I would like to try and find out how much money it would cost to get a cheap paint job just thrown on to make my car not look so crappy... Dunno.

My Grandma died last Sunday. That sucked. Drove out to NC and spent time with all the extended family. I suppose it's better as she was suffering and all. It's selfish, but I had a lot planned, and it upset me that I wasn't able to do any of it. Jenni and I were going to go looking at places for the wedding, I was going to get some more work done on those damn floors, and so on and so forth. I guess it doesn't matter though.

I was going to go out with Bobby and Mike last night. It was Mikes Birthday, and we were all going to go to Dave and Busters. Yeah. I got sick as shit last night, still am. Think it may have been the burger I had for lunch yesterday afternoon. Don't rightly know though. Hate that I missed his party. Also when I was sick I forgot to call Jenni ... Kinda passed out about twenty min after I got home from hanging out with Bobby. Worried Jenni sick cause when I talked to her last I said I was going to call her right back, and was hurrying to get off the phone as I was driving. Well, she thought something was going on and was worried when I didn't call her back that there was something bad going on. These things happen, but I wish I didn't make her worry.

Not much else really. North Carolina was nice. Good weather, Great food, got some Cheerwine in my room to drink on. Mmmm...

Oh, and I won't be doing undergraduate research cause I didn't get the form in as I was in NC. Eh, whatever I suppose. Now I'm going to see about going to bed as I don't feel well still.